Sunday, November 1, 2009

Women 10k 2009

Once again, GE10K is completed. Let's read my thoughts last year:

Women 10k 2008

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Went for the Women 10k run yesterday. The run that I've registered for in July or something which I had briefly regretted letting Gil knows cause it means no backing out then.

Being the lazy shitass me, I didn't train for it, didn't even do normal short jogs that I used to. My only 'plan' for it was going for a really short (say, 3km?) jog last Sat not for training purpose but just for the sake of letting my muscles (if any) ache first so that it won't ache that much after I am done with the 10km.

To be honest, even until the day before the run I still haven't decide whether I want to go for it. Ok lah, 10k may seem easy to you freaks but its a feat to me since I have stopped jogging after quitting netball, for MONTHS.

You can never imagine the hatred I have for myself when the alarm rang and I was still contemplating whether to go or not but finally pulled myself out of the comfy bed because Gil made me promised that I would go for it (damned).

Skeptical me gushed down bottles of 100plus at 6+ am in the morning and guess what? At the starting point the pee started to fill the bladder. I'm oh-so-smart. Got to run with pee in me, how bad is that!

It's no joke, after the 1st KM I've wanted to slap myself silly for signing up but somehow I managed to carry on KM after KM. It's bad. The fight between the devil and angel in the head.

Devil: Hey you are killing yourself if you continue on.
Angel: Oh come on you can do it, what is 10 KM?
Devil: Stop! Look around, people are walking already!
Angel: You are not one of them!

Just imagine these talks between the D and A throughout the whole damned run, it's tormenting! Have to self-deceive and everything, bad bad bad.

Somehow, anyhow, I don't know how, I managed to surprise myself by completing the run without stopping at all (except grabbing drinks at those stations). Timing wasn't that good but better than I had expected considering that I hadn't run for months? The feeling of accomplishing it was splendid though. 1h04mins. I had expected 1h20 or more.

Won't go for another of these runs in the next few months man but the next I go, I will want to do it under 1 hour and trust me I can do it! Wahahaha.

Till then!

[ham]

I went to bed at 10:30pm yesternight hoping to get ample rest before the run. But TMD, tossed and turned until 1+am and that means just 4 hours of sleep! *Gasp*

Honestly I don't know why I have my iPod on cause I don't think I was listening to the songs. I was once again, listening attentively to the Angel-Devil's conversation throughout! Horrible. OK I still have to give credit to the iPod since I blasted music over it to keep me from hearing my own out of breath breathing. Helped somehow I guess?

And haha, apparently I didn't learn my lesson from last year's run. I drank almost 1L of 100 Plus at home before I left for the event. I mean, I did pee right before I walked over to the starting point at 6:30am but what came out from the 1L was merely 30ml, no kidding. The rest was still processing. At 6:50am it was like HOLYSHIT - my bladder was filled up to 80%. GG. But I was way up front at the starting line, couldn't possibly squeeze my way out and head to the toilet which is located super far away, so yeah, live with it.

Then, the horn just suddenly sounded and I wasn't even prepared to start! Very very bad. The first KM was the worst. After just 500m I wanted to die! Like wtf? 9.5KM more to g0? So many people passed me by that I feel like just giving up right there.

Of course I didn't though. I mean, I've told so many that I want to do better than last year, if I stop just like that very malu right, seeing people stop along the way makes me feel like doing that too but I can't. I've a goal and I need to reach it - alas, the only thing that's good about the stubborn streak in me.

The usual angel-devil convo, the usual huh how long more to the next KM?, the usual counting of the steps- 1, 2, 3, 4...8 = 10 metre, the usual fwah, why haven't reach the water station?. I did it.

3 years back, if you ask me, I would never thought that I would be able to complete a good 10KM without stopping. Last year, I completed it with minimal stoppages (at the drink stations). This year, I completed it without stopping at all. Not that the timing is good or what but for me, someone who don't run much, it is a feat.

And hell yes if you ask me, I am proud of myself. I did better than last year:
(click to enlarge)

This year:

(click to enlarge)

A good 6mins shaved off and YES! Under an hour. Ok honestly I'm a little disappointed. Was expecting to do 55mins or something. But yes, that will be my target for next year. Looking at 53mins!

Gogogo! And once again, till then!!!

P/S: Oh yeah and thanks to gym-ing, my legs ain't aching at all! Unlike last year where by at this time, I would be in terrible horrible pain. ;) Even went to play badminton with sis, cousins and mum right after that! And just came back from Wii-ing at Game Haven. Gosh, all the exercise I had today! <3

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Goosebumps

I'm not imagining things but Lynn's still around. Like seconds after I posted the previous entry she MSN-ed me.

It's good to know that but I wonder why it still hurts megafucking lots.

Ouch?

Happy Birthday Lynn!

Not forgotten. Missing you where ever you are! :)

Friday, September 25, 2009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHERIE!

Wahaha that sounds pathetic. Yeah whatever.

Blogger is sweet. It shows a cake on the main page when I log in. Thank you Blogger. =)

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Tears and What's Not?

Having a really hard time this few days. One of the worst consecutive days I've ever been through.

Maybe it's the prolonged PMS that is lasting longer than it's supposed to and I'm definitely waiting desperately for the crimson tide to rush in.

Maybe it's just happened that everyone's trying to give me shit all at the same time.

Maybe it's just... it's just me?

It hadn't happened for long and I am not ashamed to say that I'm all over in tears once again and not particularly knowing why. I mean I do know that everything has built up and its taking its toll on me at this very moment and I feel like I'm really at the bottom.

And worse still? Someone came and sprinkled salt over the wounds and that finally pulled the trigger. Every fucking emotional thought that comes every now and then causes me to spill a tear or two.

Need to scream, need to chill, need TLC.

I'm in tremendous pain. Seems like no one trusts me anymore huh? Really upset for being maligned for things I didn't do. Really feel like shit when nobody is standing on my side.

Feeling so screwed up, can't seem to stop the tears from falling, can't seem to want to stop typing (I wish this is my thesis though).

Screw thesis, screw anova tests, screw bills, screw all of you.

=(

Whatever it is, the end point is, I HATE BEING ME.

I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused, all the people I've upset, all the wrong things I've done. The damage is already there and I know no matter what I do, I can't fix it completely.

Peace and be gone.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Sista

Went for movie with fam. On the way back, was randomly exaggerating-ly singing the chorus of a song.

Me: Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you. Whatever it takes, or how...... (Right Here Waiting)

*Interrupted*

Clairecia: Nothing's gonna change my love for you, you ought know by now how much I love you, one thing you can be sure of, I'll never...... (Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You)

Me: Hmmm........ Boy I miss your kisses, all the time but this is 25 minutes too late
Though you traveled so far, boy I’m sorry you are 25.......
(25 minutes)

*Silent*
.
Me: Paint my love, you should paint my love, it's the picture of a thousand sunset.....

Clairecia: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me? Don't cha, don't cha?

Me: (-_-''') OMG? WTF? HAHAHAHA.

Friday, September 4, 2009

IM IN FOUL MOOD!

I'm sorry I'm in a foul mood now and everything is irritating me, because of the previous incident (refer to previous post).

I tweeted "Where is everyone when I need to TALK" about the same previous post of course and there's stupid unrelated people (male species of course, duh) who messaged and says "boo, im free to tok"

Tok tok tok tok sai la. I talk to this kind of people I'm asking for trouble only. Double up my blood pressure.

Phew. Relax and chill.